THIS blog entry intends to find out why the death of Jesus Christ falls on a day called Good Friday when it should be called—at the very least—Bad Friday or Frigging Friday, as the case may be, especially since it’s the D-Day of the Big JC.
So why call it Good Friday for Christ’s sake?
No one is even sure whether Christ died on a Friday. Why not rearrange the event and make his crucifixion fall on a Tuesday so that the faithful can then call it Tragic Tuesday? (Wednesday can also work. Woeful Wednesday. Thursday can too—Terrible Thursday).
That way, Christians the world over, acting on their personal convictions, would take it seriously and refuse, unlike Filipino Catholics, to go to Boracay during Holy Week.
But as things stand, the date of Christ’s death and resurrection remain sadly, incomprehensible.
Let’s say—for the sake of argument—that the Son of God died on a Friday and came back to life three days hence. Three days after Friday is Monday, not Sunday.
But if we go by what the Church says, the Savior of the World experienced the Lazarus effect on a Sunday. So what does that make him? A zombie?
Indeed, leave it to organized religion to confuse their followers, something which any kind of faith-based organization is good at.
Being very well-versed in damage control and public relations, every other religious sect established by Peter, Paul, and Mary—no offense to the musical trio and their followers—have committed countless sins against humanity. And they have gotten away with it.
After all, they can always say God, Allah, Jehovah, or The Guy Upstairs put them up to it.
If everything fails to proceed according to plan, “religious leaders” can always threaten excommunication, which can always work nine times out of ten.
It didn’t work with Galileo but hey, not everyone can risk saying unpopular things, especially with threats of fire and brimstone in the afterlife.
This explains why the Roman Catholic Church remains relatively blameless for undertaking the Crusades, killing millions of Moors and allowing Muslim martyrs to enjoy seventy-seven virgins without the burden of a full-time relationship, let alone the risk of venereal disease.
Same goes for the Islamic fundamentalists.
Their suicide bombing attacks have done wonders to strengthen security—aviation and otherwise—especially in rich countries.
If it weren’t for their jihad, the United States—the world’s most powerful country and the world’s largest economy—wouldn’t have created the Homeland Security Department.
Without that agency, fat, white, patriotic Americans would have been rendered unemployable, unable to afford life’s basic necessities (i.e., beer, junk food, and financially-desperate female companions from Third World Asian countries).
Which is why the global Christian congregation should set the record straight regarding Christ’s death. Only then can the world take the Lenten Season seriously. In the meantime, it really wouldn’t hurt to visit to Boracay during the Holy Week. That is, if you can stand the crowds.
Photo above shows the Pope after Pope John Paul II, whatever his name is. The late Pope John Paul at least apologized for excommunicating Galileo. While I would have put Boracay babes in bikinis, it would have infringed on their respective rights to privacy. And I would rather incur the ire of the Pope than a Boracay babe.